Sunday, December 12, 2010
WikiLeaks, what for art thou purpose?
In the span of a month, WikiLeaks, a once-obscure community of busy-bodies dedicated to unearthing the most secretive of information for the public's consumption, made good on their threat to release on the web the biggest information leak in history.
The world woke up one morning to find hundreds of thousands of US military and diplomatic cables accessible with just a click away. Even as armies of analysts and journalists sieved through the pile for nuggets of gold - some entertaining, some shocking, most of them boring enough to warrant a yawn -, the damage was only just beginning.
Embarrassing revelations were revealed by many of the world's press, implicating hundreds of diplomats and officials (including Singapore) on thoughts that should stay private. It is not clear how these revelations could affect certain sensitive bilateral ties, but the coming months promise more leaks and more bad news.
And the world lapped it all up. While digesting press reports on the leaks, they also saw the world's superpower - led by its mighty Justice and State departments - doing almost everything they could to stop the leaks, and failing miserably at it.
It is almost amazing to see how a handful of geeks and self-proclaimed analysts can hold the US hostage to its actions, embarrass it dearly, and yet live to fight another day. The last time I checked, Wikileaks have shifted their domain to another server in the ongoing cat-and-mouse game with the authorities.
Sure, the Wikileak reports make for interesting meal-time discussions and before-bed-time laughs. But the deeper question remains: How is Wikileaks potentially benefitting the world by releasing all these cables? How is the average Joe's quality of life going to improve?
By putting the reputation (and even the lives) of thousands at risk, all in the name of the public's right to know, Wikileaks has exposed itself as an irresponsible mischief-maker, perhaps hungry only for the fame and fortune. Wikileaks founder Julian Assange just might get his million-dollar book deal but looking at the list of potential charges against him, he would have to write his book behind bars.
This whole episode however serves to highlight the disproportionate power that organisations or even individuals can have over whole governments. The web has also proven to be one of the cornerstones of asymmetric warfare in the 21st Century, and the potential for more mischief is almost unlimited.
But this is another stark reminder that Governments can't win all the time, and sometimes the best way out is to manage a defeat honourably.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
There goes the 100-day mark
When does the line cross between exercising a life-long calling and dragging your body through a 9-6 routine?
As the hours become days, the days become weeks, the weeks become months, and one can't help but wonder what will come at the end of the tunnel. What does one see beyond the paper shuffling, carrying out of orders from above, and enduring the punishing over-time schedule?
Mark Twain once joked that Man is a creature made at the end of the week's work when God was tired. God subjected Adam and Man to painful toil all the days of their lives as punishment for their intransigence. Man was not just a result of His work - we are made to work.
But work we must. No one said it was going to be easy. Nor will anyone hand you candy, hold your hands and sooth your ego with fine sugarcoating. Work can be intense and no one is going to apologise for that.
Above all, work is like living a faith. You have to find a reason to believe and hold on to it firmly. Beliefs may change, and life is a journey of finding the right set of beliefs that fit with our values, aspirations and dreams.
As an officer in the foreign service, I sometimes find myself fighting futile battles against the Great Wall of bureaucracy, and the armies of people looking to "cover" (protect) themselves on the job, sometimes at the expense of efficiency. Bureaucracies are a fixture in huge organisations, including the civil service, which is a necessary irritant to work with.
But these naggings aside, working on international relations is a whole new ball game beyond the theoretical models we used to explore as students, and the polished and simplified articles we read in the press. It is like being at a soccer match and watching the game from the start to finish. The audience gets to note every single foul committed by the players, the dirty tricks that players sometimes employ to get ahead, but also the little triumphs that makes soccer the phenomenal sport that it is. This definitely beats reading about the results from a news headline.
You get privy to the thoughts of the world's movers and shakers: Presidents, Ministers, politicians, diplomats, academics, and more. You become aware of the dynamics of competing and converging national interests, and the ruthlessness of realpolitik. You also become involved in the cumbersome but important process of drafting texts where the slightest misplacing of a comma can mean everything.
International relations used to be a distant blur of wars fought between diplomats and soldiers, and spoken in a language that may as well be Klingon to any of us. But now, I am more appreciative of how it affects the world, our national interests and our daily lives. Diplomacy is a world that never tires or sleeps. For every minute that we rest on our laurels, our foreign compatriots are probably working as hard, or even harder, to get ahead.
Take for instance the Doha Round negotiations in Geneva: The trade representatives to the World Trade Organisation engage in horse-trading and deal-making to protect their national interests. Sometimes, they have to work behind-the-scenes to gather allies and deter rivals. We work hard so that the food we put on the table will remain affordable, our companies can enter new markets without fear of their technology being stolen by competitors, and there are enough jobs to go around, among many knock-over effects of effective diplomacy.
The movies may glamourise diplomats as sipping champagne while rubbing shoulders with the world's elite and striking deals that will affect the world. WikiLeaks may remove the veil of secrecy over diplomacy and reveal the hilarious side of political reporting. Cast those impressions aside, diplomacy is about ensuring the continuity of our way of life and making our society a little better for you and me to live in, by ensuring that our interests are secure.
I guess I will be staying at where I am for some time: watching, learning, experimenting, making mistakes, but above all, holding on to a faith.
Monday, June 28, 2010
Seek ye faith goals
Setting faith goals is different from setting SMART goals. What are 'faith goals'?
"A faith goal is a goal set in hope and based on things unseen. It is setting a goal that is measurable and based on spiritual power. That is, the power to create and imagine what is not yet seen or made manifest." (Source)
For example, someone who sets a goal of becoming the most successful trainer in Singapore may not necessarily know how to achieve it or begin immediately. He (or she) does it out of faith, and the belief that God will show a path to achieving this goal.
As I continue to put some thought into my faith goals, here are some (admittedly ambitious) goals I've set for the next few years.
Traveling:
- Travel (preferably backpack) to 3 different countries a year. I will journal my travels based on themes specific to the countries. Who knows, I might even get to write a book on it! Thanks to Varun for this idea
- Join an open cell with the adult service. I've spoken to Pastor about this and I'm quite keen to hear his plans
- Serve with the church's PR wing, considering the rapidly-changing landscape that mega-churches find themselves operating in today. Credit to Josh and Jason for giving me this inspiration
- Resume my first love: fencing - probably with my previous club, Z Fencing. Hope to see some familiar faces. Weekday nights will never be the same again.
- Get a beginner's diving license so I can finally experience the awesome diving sites in Southeast Asia
- Achieve silver for IPPT every year
- Run 2 half-marathons and a full-marathon per annum
- Take up golf. I've decided to do this when I learnt how cheap it was to take up a course and hit 100 balls at the range per game
- Savings rate of 50-70% to be partially invested in time deposits, REITS and unit trusts (with medium-low to medium risk for a 10-yr horizon period at 10 to 15 percent growth per annum). I'm beginning to outgrow my Prudential and Great Eastern savings plans
- Clear my Class 2 and 3 license. Since my travels to India and Vietnam, I've decided that the best (and fun) way to survive in many developing countries is to negotiate the maze of traffic by motorbike
- Finish a book every month
- Get a diploma in a third language (either Arabic or a SEAsian language)
- Purchase a DSLR and start snapping!
Saturday, June 26, 2010
When we were continents apart
You were just sitting a foot away from me but in many ways, we were continents apart. Emotionally distant to the core, I felt the icy reception and your efforts to keep me out. I tried to enter but you wouldn't let me. What were you trying to prove to me?
I asked those questions, and said what I said because I care. I cared enough to want to understand you better and put some thought into what you said because what you say meant something to me.
But you simply didn't care and dismissed me. And it hurt.
Sometimes, I question why I should even bother. I could just simply walk away, blame myself for doing all those things that I did, and well, just walk our separate routes. But a true friend does not walk away, nor quits on the first whim of trouble. I may not be the best of your friends, but I try to be true. Unfortunately, it may not be enough for you.
I felt the Lord prompt me today: Live your life not on emotions, but on Me and My Word. My faith drives me forward and gives me the justification to do what I do.
I do not seek to change the way that you think, but I only hope to find some common ground and bridge that gap between us. It will certainly help if you can let me past that cold-hard exterior of yours. Foolish it may seem, I still believe that the strongest sunlight can melt the hardest ice-berg.
Meanwhile, I'm happy that you're happy and that is enough for me.
Monday, June 21, 2010
The Korean cold-war divide hits home
If you watch matches with a specific country crowd, you will know how much pride they have in their teams. Take the South Koreans for example. The Korean Association will book the Vgolf bar (at the entrance to Bras Basah station) for all Koreans for exclusive screening of all Korean matches in the World Cup.
Going for one of these screenings can be an unforgettable experience. Armed to the teeth with much fanfare and optimism with kids in tow, the Koreans (and their non-Korean supporters) will turn up in a sea of red and pack the bar to the brim. Sometimes, they also head to the nearby Irish Pub for some good old soccer action over a hearty glass of Budweiser.
I remember the fateful match against former champions Argentina. The Korean team fared bravely against the La Albiceleste who had better forwards, but the Korean audience was still extremely enthusiastic and supportive. They would sigh collectively whenever their team misses goals by a knife edge, clap whenever the defence or goalie successfully parries the much vaunted Argentinian bulldozer attack, and cheer whenever their mid-fields and forwards gets the initiative with the ball.
Down by 2 goals at the 32nd minute, the Koreans were certainly not out. Then it happened in the 45th minute, when Lee Chung-Young took advantage of a dittering Martin Demichelis who was dwelling on the ball for too long, lunged from nowhere, and scored their first goal against the Argentinians. The whole crowd seemed to throw their hands into the air in unison with a collective, rumbling roar that rankled the bar and stunned the over-stressed beer ladies, some jumping and screaming with joy, others hugging in groups.
But above all, we were all cheering a common language: Korea hwaiting! hwaiting! hwaiting! (fighting, fighting, fighting). In that moment, it is almost impossible not to feel solidarity with the Koreans infused with a sense of asian pride and nationalism.
The Koreans went down 4-1 but the audience was still appreciative of their team. Win or lose, there was still pride in being Korean, and respect for playing on the grandest stage of all.
However, the North Korean match against Portugal was a different story. Despite being a prime-time Monday evening slot, the Vgolf bar was not screening the match (apparently, the Korean Association conspicuously failed to book the bar) and not a single Korean was in sight even before the match. A small group of Koreans strolled into the Irish Pub minutes into the match, and stayed silent as the North Koreans flopped against the on-form Portuguese who had a field day with 7 goals against nil.
Only the non-Koreans were cheering for the underdogs who braved the rain and slippery field to give Portugal a run for their money in the first half of the match. But gone were the red shirts, the Korean cheers, and more importantly, the support from their fellow Choson countrymen.
What happened? Did the South Koreans stay away because of the fallout from the sinking of the Cheonan warship? Or they just simply didn't care?
I was pretty convinced that North or South Korean, they will still cheer for each other, with a more affirmed recognition and pride of their solidarity as the Choson people. Guess I was wrong.
But nevertheless, I will still cheer for the Koreans, despite the cold-war divide.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Goodbye to freelance writing
No more contributions or short columns in the Straits Times: Youthink. No more set piece articles for the Business Times Campus Life.
The Government simply can't let one of its civil servants run amok and write to (or for) the media. And as an employee, I can't moonlight with a second career.
Writing has, in a way, been a form of rebellion for me. It has been about speaking up, challenging the status quo at times, or advocating a certain point of view, even if it is not the most popular. Disagreements can happen but in the best of scenarios, we all agree to disagree. The freedom to write is addictive but it comes with a price: exposed to public scrutiny, you have to stand by everything that you write, or risk your credibility.
But after more than four years, seeing fellow writers and editors come and go, and with more 40 pieces to my name, I still believe that I have so much room for improvement. Writing, while soothing and therapeutic, can also expose your shortcomings and vulnerabilities, fears and regrets, because writing demands a certain level of critical self-evaluation and frankness that many will shy from.
But it's not entirely over. Writers, as people, can evolve too.
This summer, I have a new vision: to visit at least three different countries a year, preferably on a backpacking trip, and write about these trips. There is aplenty to write about their history and culture, the wonderful people that you meet, the crazy things that you do, and the insights that you get.
I especially enjoy the flood of ideas and excitement whenever a new experience emerges, time slows down when all of my senses are activated, and I tell myself," Man, I'm so gonna write about this."
Alas, a lot of these "real, in-your-face" experiences will never be possible on a guided working trip which includes living in hotels and taken to sight-seeing places in an air conditioned bus. To fully experience life in another country, one has to trudge it out on foot, brave the traffic conditions, eat street food, and mingle with the man on the street. But as one grows older, that becomes less possible.
But till then, the dictum remains the same: the pen is certainly mightier than the sword, while words can be sharper than the finest blade, and louder than the biggest guns in the world.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
A tale of spies, money and power
3. Through a series of round robin clashes and the rise and fall of many personalities who briefly warmed the seat of the Prime Minister, Putin emerged as the eventual successor of the ailing Yeltsin who favoured him for his loyalty and democratic tendencies. Putin won the 2000 elections handsomely, backed by oligarchs like Boris Berezovsky who campaigned endlessly for him and supported him with his vast and independent media empire. Boris became Putin's mentor and was convinced that Putin was the right successor to continue Yeltin's mission to democratize Russian politics.
4. However, Boris and the reformers were to be sorely disappointed as Putin turned out to be a hawk. He installed hardliners in his administration, centralised state control over the military, economy and intelligence services, persecuted the oligarchs and alleged opponents of the state, reversed Yeltsin's privatisation programme, and clamped down on independent media in Russia. Threatened by the regime, Boris and Sasha were forced to join the long list of emigres abroad as Putin consolidated his hold over Russia.
5. There were also allegations that the infamous Moscow apartment bombings in 1999 (dubbed Russia's 9'11) that sparked the second Chechen War - which helped cement Putin's popularity - was actually perpetuated by the FSB who wanted to see Chechnya brought into the fold of the old Russian empire. Other allegations included that the 2002 fateful siege of the Moscow theatre by Chechen militants that left almost 150 people dead, was actually planned by the FSB to cultivate a climate of fear and justify continued military involvement in Chechnya despite staggering losses suffered by the Russian military with little end to the war. The state also persecuted and assasinated Duma representatives, journalists and human-rights activitists who opposed the Chechen War.
6. Russian dissidents even accused the world of looking the other way as the Russians committed countless atrocities in Chechnya. For instance, the Bush administration was especially eager to cultivate relations with Putin, seeing in him "an ally who can be trusted", and dismissed the Chechen War as a domestic Russian campaign against "home-grown terrorism". Boris and his dissident counterparts attempted to tell "the truth" about the regime and waged an intense PR and media campaign against Putin. They were resisted by the Kremlin who engaged in their own counter-campaign of misinformation, and attempted unsuccessfully to repatriate Russian emigres whom they accused of subversion and disloyalty.
As the author pointed put, Sasha's death pointed to the extent of Russia's failed democratic experiment since the collapse of the Soviet Union, Putin's zealousness in eliminating his opponents with the domination that the FSB had over the Russian government. More importantly, it provided a glimpse of the intense power struggle behind the scenes of Russian politics, and the type of regime that the world has to deal with for the foreseeable future.
The future path of development in Russia and the accuracy of these insights are best left to readers to decide for themselves. However, one thing is certain: that the book will take you on a journey to see how deep the rabbit-hole really goes.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
The Eroding Union (EU)?
Critics of the Euro zone, like the UK, have high-lighted these weaknesses for years. Countries considering joining the Euro zone might think twice ahead.
However, to be fair, the Euro has proven to be a balk ward of stability against currency manipulation and fluctuation, facilitating trade and giving the EU much economic stability for years.
But as the Greek crisis has shown, a system that allows the EU to prosper in good times may not have the same capacity to do so during the bad times.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Finishing the marathon after 4 loonngggggg years
It's that time of the year when the Government releases its revised forecast for the year's economic growth, more babies are born (yes, many more April and May babies out there), the stream of campus crowd whirls down to a trickle, it's harder to get flight tickets for that summer holiday, and yes, people graduate.
I never thought I will ever write this post four years ago. Fresh out of summer orientation camp, there was me, part of an army of blur, beady-eyed freshmen sighing about the prospects of intense class participation in our first day of class in 2006, and looking lost amidst the sea of equally-lost freshmen. Back then, graduation seemed like an eternity away.
Now, convocation seemed like yesterday.
4 years of group projects, term papers, presentations and examinations has now given way to: many, many more years of group projects, term papers, presentations and examinations, especially for folks like me joining the Civil Service.
Graduation is more akin to finishing a marathon than getting the top poles in a race. In a 21 or 42-km marathon, no one gives a damn about the winner, or remembers his\her name 1 year down the road. But everyone remembers the sweat, the breathlessness, the little triumphs we get when we edge a little closer towards the finish line, the sight of hundreds of runners running alongside you on the same journey, and sometimes the pain when your ankles give way.
Here are some 10 take-aways that I want to impart to you, my dear reader. If you have already graduated, kudos to you and I hope you relive a glimpse of your student life amidst these words. If you haven't graduated, I hope you will find some strength or inspiration from here.
1. Making $1 million & cooking Naples-style spaghetti
Not satisfied with what you're learning in class? Get out and choose from the countless seminars, workshops and conferences in school or beyond that caters to almost every whim and fancy. Every semester, there are entrepreneurs, academics, activists, journalists, bureaucrats and others speaking on topics ranging from making $1 million before the age of 28 to cooking Naples-style spaghetti. Be inspired, and inspire others.
2. The limits of a 5-year old online portal
Don't complain about the school not providing enough internship opportunities for you. I've come to realise how students have become so reliant on OnTrac. The last thing that you want to limit your future with is a 5-year old online portal manned by 4 blokes. There are literally hundreds of companies and organisations that you can apply directly with that is sure to be aligned with your interests. Take some initiative and do your own research. Write in YOURSELF.
3. A smile a day may bring a favour your way
Be nice to all the staff, even the security guards and cleaners. Put yourself in their shoes. They have a job to do, so don't get in their way by making unreasonable demands, or not cooperating with them. Be nasty to them and you make their job even worse. Be nice to them and you bring a cheer to their day, even a favour that will be paid back when you need their help again (and you will, trust me).
4. Some of the best friends I made...
Are the ones I met through joining student clubs. Yes, one of the best ways to make friends is to join a student club. Sink your roots in and commit to a few good years. You will be surprised with what you learn, the number of people you meet along the way, and even meet your future beau. Don't join a club just for your resume. People can tell if you're genuine or if you're there for selfish reasons.
5. For taking that solo stroll
If you ever need a quiet place to read (not the library), chill or just walk to get inspiration, try the Singapore Art Museum with its cafes and galleries, the Esplanade and its windy roof-top, the National Museum with its lovely Novus bar, the Fort Canning Park with its mini-maze of flora and fauna, or even our very own Wellness Centre with its massage chairs and dim lights. Plus there are about a hundred more places that you can go to (Buzz me if you need more information).
6. The world is a book & those who do not travel read only a page
To get something akin to changing your perspective of life, go overseas for an exchange, internship, or even a prolonged CIP. Regardless of where you go to, the key is get yourself away from the hustle and bustle of Singapore, immerse yourself in a foreign culture (no, playing beer pong with the Irish does NOT count), witness how their people live and work, and put yourself in their shoes. Limit yourself to Singapore and your mindset will always be limited at that.
7. Of bad emails & worse excuses
I'm always bemused by how many students clubs can be so unprofessional, given the string of horror incidents such as emails being addressed to the wrong CEOs (sometimes they get the gender wrong too), with multiple typos, and a whole lot of other stuff that can get you fired in the corporate world. There is no excuse for not getting your facts right when it's within your locus of control. Always think about how others will perceive your club's name. Treat others professionally and you will be given the due respect too.
8. It's not just about watching the time, dear
Effective time management is not just about cramming as many tasks and responsibilities into your 24 hours a day. It's also about keeping to your word, committing to your goals, and doing what you say you will do. If you find yourself apologising once too often for late work (or late replies..."Eh guys, sorry for the late reply \ sorry for sending this in late") and broken promises, perhaps it's time to stop apologising and do a revamp of your time management plan.
9. Quit the verbal diarrhea
Let's face it: we all like to complain about our long days, workload, lousy food, and other issues unfortunate to be the target of our verbal diarrhea. We take a certain pleasure to hitting back at "the system" (because it's so darn cool to be a rebel) and making ourselves the anti-hero or the victim in the story. But let's ask ourselves: when are we ever going to be satisfied with our lives? Being a responsible student is more than just putting in the hours in the library. It's about being a part of the school community, giving feedback to people who are in the position to make changes, or getting your peers together to make some REAL change. Don't just sit on your asses all day and complain (I call that "potshot sniping").
10. YOU can be the source of change
I've always found it more exciting to talk to people who are passionate about a cause: whether it's about improving student welfare, helping the less fortunate, or even pushing to set up a mahjong club despite repeated rejections from the administration. As Bill Gates said it at a Harvard Commencement, one of the greatest experiences one can ever have in life is to be an activist of sorts to take on the big inequities in our community and the world. Rather than just being mere robots without a soul or conviction about an issue, why not make a stand and see how you can be that source of change?
Thursday, March 4, 2010
What will your reward be?
About that time, a businessman came walking down the beach, trying to relieve some of the stress of his workday. He noticed the fisherman sitting on the beach and decided to find out why this fisherman was fishing instead of working harder to make a living for himself and his family. "You aren't going to catch many fish that way," said the businessman to the fisherman. "You should be working rather than lying on the beach!"
The fisherman looked up at the businessman, smiled and replied, "And what will my reward be?" "Well, you can get bigger nets and catch more fish!" was the businessman's answer. "And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman, still smiling. The businessman replied, "You will make money and you'll be able to buy a boat, which will then result in larger catches of fish!" "And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman again. The businessman was beginning to get a little irritated with the fisherman's questions. "You can buy a bigger boat, and hire some people to work for you!" he said.
"And then what will my reward be?" repeated the fisherman. The businessman was getting angry. "Don't you understand? You can build up a fleet of fishing boats, sail all over the world, and let all your employees catch fish for you!" Once again the fisherman asked, "And then what will my reward be?" The businessman was red with rage and shouted at the fisherman, "Don't you understand that you can become so rich that you will never have to work for your living again! You can spend all the rest of your days sitting on this beach, looking at the sunset. You won't have a care in the world!"
The fisherman, still smiling, looked up and said, "And what do you think I'm doing right now?"
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
A language crisis or something else?
I am increasingly frustrated at my inability to communicate effectively with my Mandarin and dialect-speaking relatives (mainly the older folks from my Mum's side). Yes, some of my younger cousins can converse in English but prefer to speak in Mandarin, having been raised in a Chinese-speaking family environment.
It can't be a matter of language or some generational gap too as my cousin nicely pointed out today that my command of Mandarin is fine (which I strongly disagree) while I have no issues conversing with my English-speaking older relatives.
Methinks it is something else.
Having been raised in an upper middle-class family, taught in an almost exclusively all-English environment at home (although I speak to my Mum in a mixture of English and Mandarin) and school (minus the Mandarin classes), and exposed to ideas and principles like any member of the Western-educated intelligentsia (a general labeling that includes university students in Singapore) are, I feel continents apart from some of my folks.
There seems to be a chasm of thinking that divides the English and Chinese-speaking population, one based on family values and different language backgrounds that determine the type of literature one is exposed to, thereby shaping one's view of life and the world.
But the truth is that Mandarin is still the dominant language of the heartlands (which constitutes the majority of Chinese Singaporeans) while English, which is the language of government, business and education, constitutes only a minority of the population.
Having been trained almost exclusively in the latter, I believe I speak for most English-speaking Singaporeans who may feel this sense of alienation from the majority of the Chinese population who speak primarily Mandarin and dialects.
We are always so fixated about divisions along racial, religious and class lines. How about examining the divisions created by the family-language backgrounds that we all hail from?
Saturday, February 13, 2010
The truth has been set free
For four years, she harboured the truth behind her wanting to separate from my Dad.
As a result, she could not sleep properly, even when she moved out of the family home. Not always a good communicator, she did not share her burden with us but chose to let her actions do the talking: working hard running her own business and silently caring for her children by protecting the family assets for our future.
All the while, the truth cried to be set free but as a woman, she chose to suppress it for the good of the family.
This week, the truth finally surfaced. It came as a shock but we realised how crucial it was to move on. To simply linger in the past and point the blame finger is destructive and pointless. As a family, we have had enough of the quarrels and umpteen family meetings to mediate in disputes between both of them. We had to move to a space where new possibilities can be created.
As the saying goes, to win in life, sometimes one has to lose some. None of us asked for this to happen, but you can't have everything in life. You have to adapt and make the best of the situation.
My parents have decided to officially go their separate ways with no more claims against each other. It is for the better. Now, my Mum is happier and there seems to be this great and invisible burden lifted off everyone's chest.
Now it's time to rebuild the family again with faith, hope and love.