A couple of years back, if someone were to ask me if my family was a priority in my life, I would say 'no'.
Today, the answer will be an unequivocal 'yes'. Why?
I have seen how families can tear apart because no one in the family was willing, or had the courage in come in and intervene when there were family disputes. I have seen families with so much bad blood between the members just stray apart because of all the negative feelings clouding the perceptions they had of each other. Fast forward it 20 years down the road and think of all the wasted years of frayed relationships, and the cost of it all. Is it worth it?
Imagine starting your own family and your son\daughter asks you "What happened between you and uncle\aunt\grandfather\grandmother?". How would you answer?
"Oh, we just have our differences," you sheepishly say, then go back to lecturing them on how they should patch up their differences with the kid they had a fight with in the playground.
I want to bring up my family in an environment where they can develop and grow with the right values about people, and especially towards people. I want my family members to experience the joy of togetherness, of unity, of shared experience, and the sense of security from being around the very people who gave birth to them, and spent their childhood with. There are so much indescribable feelings in seeing a family that is so in love and happy with each other.
That's why we have to make a stand when family disputes happen, especially the kind that threatens to break up your family. I know that certain disputes just seem insolvable and there are times when you just feel like running away from it all. Thinking about it makes you feel sad and helpless.
Trust me, I've experienced it all. There are times when I buried myself with work and did things that distracted me from the problems at home. But I found that I did not like the path that it led me to because I know it will only lead to more alienation from the family that I have grown up with throughout my life. Problems don't go away just because we want them to.
But there is no place truly like home. And if one gives in to resignation and despair, the battle is already lost. And with that, all hopes of reconciliation are gone. What a waste.
You see, we all have a choice in life. We can choose to sit back and take the blows from life's twisted paths, and always accepting things for what they are because we are just...fatalistic. Or we can choose to take control and change the situation around us for the better. If we fail trying, oh well. At least, we've tried and can boldly lift our heads high, knowing that we did not give in to resignation.
And while I do my best, I can only hope and pray that things will be for the better for my family. And I pray that you and your family will enjoy the fruits of togetherness.